BLINDSPOTS:
Movie Reviews for Visually Impaired People

"Everyone Says I Love You," written and directed by Woody Allen, is a musical comedy, that's rated "R" and has a running time of a little more than an hour and a half. The main stars are Goldie Hawn, Alan Alda, Julia Roberts, Drew Barrymore and, of course, Woody Allen.

This is a complex story about a well to do family, their struggles with relationships and their dysfunctional, strange patterns of behavior. I would, more appropriately, call this musical comedy a nonsensical farce, with few redeeming features. Allen, once again, has cast himself in the role of the loser, this time named Joe, who is struggling with his inability to find a good relationship. His former wife, Steffy, played superbly by Hawn is currently married to Bob, Alan Alda, and together, the three try to help Joe with his problem.

Even Joe's daughters are trying to help him, and one of them assists him with confidential information about Von, played by Julia Roberts, the latest in a string of women that Joe has a crush on. The movie takes some playful twists and turns and then...just ends! Ho hum.

From the visually impaired point of view, this movie starts out all right, with an on-going narrative that introduces each character. There were a few one minute scenes showing the characters in action, giving you a pretty good idea of who they are. There were some abrupt scene changes, but not enough to cause much confusion. The main difficulty was the musical part of the picture. There were at least seven songs and two instrumentals where I needed lots of assistance from my sighted friend. Lots of action was taking place on the screen while the songs were being sung, and I consistently felt a longing for more descriptions. A few times the audience laughed at the antics going on, but I had no idea what was happening. Close to the end of the movie, there was a scene with Allen and Hawn singing and dancing. The technology had them doing super-human feats in the dance; a dancer's wildest fantasy. This probably looked great on the screen, but for me, I could only imagine...

In spite of feeling disappointed by the content and struggling so much with the musical part, I'll still give this movie a 5. If you go to this movie, you will have some difficulties. But I think the constant dialogue will make it barely acceptable.


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